When humor goes, there goes civilization. ~Erma Bombeck

July 31, 2010

I'm Too Sexy For My Shirt

This is my brother Matt. As you can see by this picture he is full of it. All of my brothers are.


We were helping our brother Chad move into their new house today. I don't know about you but, I have my standard gardening, painting, moving type outfits. So today I wore one of them. My shirt had a little hole in the arm pit. I know you are all shocked.

Well, after this was revealed I should have known better than to lay back on the lounge chair with my arm in the air.

No sooner had I done that then Matt who let's just say isn't the most athletic guy in town, was across the room, dug his fingers into my shirt and ripped it from a little hole in the arm pit to full on frontal nudity. (only I had on underwear)

My 12 year old nephew was so lucky to be there. Don't worry he's with the therapist right now.

Luckily no one else was there at the moment, except my other brother and, my mom and, sister in law.

My SIL offered to go get me one of her shirts. Let's see how do I explain her shape. Oh, hear are some words....
Bean pole
Skinny B
I said "No thanks, I would rather sit here naked and let your neighbor Raymond see me like this than stuffed into one of your shirts."

Who is Raymond? He is there old neighbor, originally from China. He told us we weren't very nice to each other.
We were on our best behaviour because the neighbors were helping and crap like that. He hadn't even seen the shirt incident.
He also told me that if he had a family like ours helping him move it would have taken him a year.
I said "Up YOURS Raymond!" ( in my head)
Raymond was getting on my last nerve. However, I knew he would walk into the room and some how not appreciate my ripped open shirt with all my womanly beauty flapping about so....

I quickly found some painters tape and did the best I could. I didn't realize how talented I am. Best thing is the shirt was saved.

Raymond didn't even dare ask what was going on. I think he just thought I was being artistic. Plus, I wasn't going to tell my SIL Holly this but, sweet Raymond is who put the big hole in the wall in Max's bedroom today while setting up beds. HA, take that Raymond! ( By the way, who do you know from China named Raymond??!!?) 


Garden of Egan said...

I love your tape job. I think you may have gotten back at your dorky brother. I think maybe you could short sheet the beds, but salt in the sugar bowl, that sort of stuff.
Just trying to help.

Lorilee said...

Sounds like lots of families I know!!!Pour Raymond much not have much fun!

Anonymous said...

You are one cool woman, I tell you! I would have cried and ripped my brother apart. I am learning from you!

Raymond from China? I don't think I know anyone from there.

This Raymond sounds a little crazy though!

Darlene said...

HAHAHAHA I love your cool taped up shirt! Hmmmmm I don't think I know Raymond from China!

Julie Harward said...

Well, I think it really added some style to the t shirt with that tape..I see a new trend on the runways! Good luck to them living by Raymond LOL

Connie said...

Who was Raymond trying to get back at by putting a hole in the wall? I bet Raymond's real name starts with an X and his english teacher gave him the Raymond name.

You are stylin', woman! Love the taped shirt. I think I'll rip one of my shirts just so I can look like you!

Kristina P. said...

Sounds like my kind of brother! Nudity, here we come!

Cherie said...

I've always said Duct tape could fix anything - maybe painters tape is just as good - LOL!! You are funny!
And Raymond...from China? Go figure!

Mimi Sue said...

You are so very talented! So creative with the tape...Brothers are a pain no matter how old they are. I LOVE that your womanly beauty flaps around. Just like me! Hope your nephew isn't scarred for life. Mimi

Barbaloot said...

That's so something my brothers would do! Very nice taping job:)

Also---I was thinking Raymond was a weird Chinese name! But did he give it to him when he came here? Cuz I know that's what lots of them do. I have a Chinese sister-in-law, and her "American" name is Jessica.

Grand Pooba said...

You are one sexy B!!

Deanna said...

oh lordy, you did make me laugh with this one. Love the fashion statement. You rock!

TMI Tara said...

Nana you're nuts, but not as nuts as that Chinaman named Raymond!

Messy Jess said...

that is funny - I love your attitude

Heather Putnam said...

Oh my hell LOL!! I remember that day! I actually think Raymond wanted to help you tear off the rest of your shirt ;)